I love my Fitbit. Every hour it vibrates to let me know that I need to get up and move. When I first got it a little over a year ago, I would actually get up and walk around until I got my 250 steps in for that hour. Over time though, I would ignore the vibration periodically.
I just checked the app to see when’s the last time I got all my hourly steps in during the day. Y’all, it was February of last year! What happened?
We don’t always know why we go through hard things. Painful things. Depressing things. Heartbreaking things. Sometimes, there is a “reason” at the end, and we understand. Sometime there isn’t, and we are left wondering why. Why did this happen? But more importantly, why did God let this happen?
Texas was home for my first eighteen years until 1997 when I moved up north to first Montana then Washington. I now have four children and due to the cost of plane tickets, I am only able to go visit every two to three years. In fact, until this past December, I hadn’t been home for Christmas since before I left in 1996.
Imagine you’re lying in bed next to your spouse, eagerly waiting for them to wake up. You gaze upon them quietly with love and admiration until finally they open their eyes. But the first thing they do is grab their phone and check for missed messages or emails. They don’t even bother to say good morning to you.
Sometimes we get discouraged while praying for the lost. We faithfully pray for that lost child or spouse and we aren’t seeing any change. Occasionally, we may even feel like giving up or “giving it to God” and stop praying about it. I think the real definition of giving it to God is- stop worrying about it but keep on praying about it!
If you haven’t already, please go back and read the intro. These letters will make much more sense if you read the intro first, thanks.
January 19, 2019*
I don’t know what’s going on with me today. I’m just really not feeling it. I’m so bored with life. Bored of shopping. Bored of laundry. Bored of cleaning. Bored of working. Bored of the same ole same ole every week. Day in, day out. There must be more to life than how I’m living.