Don’t Wait for a Revival

man in suit and dress shoes sitting on alter steps of a church. empty church pews in the background

 Our annual youth convention is only eight days away. I must confess, it is the highlight of my year. Why is that? Because we usually have a powerful move of God every service!

What separates these services apart from any other service? Usually, I will pray more and fast the days leading up to youth convention. Is that what makes a difference? Maybe, but I think the difference is that we come expecting.

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Ramblings from the Wilderness- Part Four

barren wilderness with blue sky and small, desert trees

If you haven’t already, please go back and read the intro. These letters will make much more sense if you read the intro first, thanks.


August 12, 2015

Dear Jesus,

Today I am so tired. So worn out. So burned out. So frustrated. So give out. I desperately want to send my kids to a friend’s house and just do nothing for like three days. No work, no cleaning, nothing! Sometimes I just want to lie down and die. I work so hard and wear myself out but never get ahead. I’m always behind on bills, and I can never do anything fun with my kids.

Continue reading Ramblings from the Wilderness- Part Four

He Will Restore the Locust Years

child lying in a file of dandelions, blowing the seeds off of one.

All these letters I’ve been posting lately really make me realize how broken I was for five years. Today on the way to church I was listening to “Waymaker”– which, by the way, is one of my favorite songs, and if you’ve never heard it, I highly suggest you take a listen- and I was thinking back about how God has been working in my life.

One part of the song says,
“Even when I don’t feel it, you’re working.
Even when I don’t see it, you’re working.
You never stop, you never stop working.”
That part really resonates with me because oftentimes, I can’t feel or see God at work, but I know he never stops working.

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Ramblings from the Wilderness- Part Three

sandy desert at sunset with orange sky

If you haven’t already, please go back and read the intro. These letters will make much more sense if you read the intro first, thanks.


July 2, 2015

Dear Jesus,

 I’m so tired of feeling hopeless. I hate my life. I know I shouldn’t say that, but I do. I am so joyless, better, and angry all the time. I can’t remember the last time I was truly happy. I dream of just lying down to die. I just want to give up. I don’t see the point. I feel defeated.

Continue reading Ramblings from the Wilderness- Part Three

Ramblings from the Wilderness- Part Two

desert with blue sky and footprints

*If you haven’t already, please go back and read the intro. These letters will make much more sense if you read the intro first, thanks.


June 25, 2015

Dear Jesus, 

I’m finding it harder and harder to find someone to relate to me. I always feel like I’m a burden or a pest when I try to talk to other people about my problems. I used to feel as though I could tell my friends anything and they would listen and give me advice. But now it seems they are just listening to be nice and are tired of hearing from me. I can’t say that I blame them. I’m tired of myself and my same old problems too. So, I guess I will just use this time of friendless solitude to take my problems to the Lord, and hopefully change some things. Maybe that’s what God wants me to do, why he’s he has removed all my friends. Who knows? Problems I need to address:

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Ramblings from the Wilderness-Part One

desert wilderness with red sand and two small mountains

*If you haven’t already, please go back and read the intro. These letters will make much more sense if you read the intro first, thanks.


No date- circa 2015

Dear Jesus,

I feel so alone, empty, and joyless. I don’t quite know what’s wrong with me, and I sure don’t know how to fix it. I know you see me as I drive to and from work. I just sit there staring off into space with this void in my soul. This is how I truly feel- empty. I feel that the life has been sucked out of me. Like all hope is gone. I feel so lost. I don’t know where to go or what to do. I don’t know how to take care of my kids. I don’t know how we are going to survive.

Continue reading Ramblings from the Wilderness-Part One

Ramblings from the Wilderness- Intro

barren wilderness at night with a small wooden sign written in a foreign language

This is a collection of seven letters that I wrote to God during a very, very dark time in my life. The purpose for publishing these letters is not to get sympathy but rather to give you a look into the mind of someone with mental illness and help the world realize that looks can be deceiving.

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Daniel’s Fast Compliant 3-Ingredients, 3-Minutes Oatmeal

cereal, oatmeal on a spoon

I like oatmeal. I used to use the instant oatmeal packets because they were fast and easy. Some of them are even portioned for 100 calories, which made it even better in my opinion.

But one day, I wanted to start a 21-day Daniel’s fast and soon learned that my oatmeal packets were off limits. So, the search was on to find a clean, Daniel’s fast approved oatmeal recipe. Continue reading Daniel’s Fast Compliant 3-Ingredients, 3-Minutes Oatmeal